Well I don’t know why I always end up crying when exhausted. I’m such a crybaby. I know it’s silly, I’m just physically and mentally tired with my never ending tasks (don’t mind too much, I’m just having hard time, let me enjoy this with whining all around.)
One thing that I learned: It doesn’t matter how smart you are, how good is your sense, or how hard you work. It would be never enough. In the end, if you can’t balancing your life and your work, you’ll be consumed till gone.
‘Loro‘ in Javanese has two meanings based on its vocal pronunciation. If you say ‘o’ like ‘or‘ it means ‘sick‘, if you say ‘o’ like ‘allegro‘ it means ‘two‘. Recently my health getting worse due to transition season and deadlines, and it makes me afraid getting sick for the second time (I won’t going back to the hospital, I won’t see the doctor). That explains why I lost my mood then. See another Javanese series here.
Read my writing one week ago about my whining, looks like now my logic has been back and trying to see from different perspective. Well, everyone exhausted, (let’s assume) everyone is working hard. If I’m in the lowest point and can’t help mumble grmbl all day long, it might be my heart or body not strong enough to hold it anymore. To me, this is so normal, it’s just like a phase. Good and bad things always come time to time. And I love dynamic stage.
On that lowest stage, I want to give up and release all of this responsibility. I always think that world needs me, whereas in fact I haven’t give anything worth to this place. Still have to learn many things, like patience and perseverance.
PS I write this continued my previous career life review. I think it should be named career journey. Soon I will write about my perspective in my work place 🙂